*Sigh*…“What’s wrong Peter Pumpkin, something got your gourd?” snickered Scotty Scarecrow.
“Nah…I guess…well, it’s just…”, Peter Pumpkin tried to say, swallowing
hard, mid-sentence, as if a big ol’ lump of pumpkin pulp got stuck in
his throat.
“Spit it out, minus the seeds, will ya?” said Scotty, stifling this time the urge to chortle.
“Well geez, all the bigger pumpkins have been sold in Farmer
Brown’s pumpkin patch. All, that is, except for me,” Peter said with
such an orangery forlorn look.
“Ah, Peter, it happens, huh? Maybe you were just too big, too
beautiful-even, so Farmer Brown made you a hefty price. Maybe you are
the Gauguin of Gourds and nobody can afford you,” offered Scotty.
“Yeah…maybe,” Peter sighed, not really buying into the Big Bling excuse.
“Listen. Sure, you’re the last big one, the last best looking, all firm
and perfectly symmetrical in all your pumpkin perfection, but there’s a
truckload of other pumpkins lying around you, it’s not like you’re
all alone and abandoned here. I’m here too, and no one is going to
buy me. Look at the state I’m in, all shrivelled up and ragged clothes,
I’m a scarecrow only my Mother could love,” Scotty offered in his
feign attempt to bolster up the spirits of his pouty, pulpy friend.
“Yeah. But, Scotty, that is how you’re supposed to look. If there were a sale on scary scarecrows, you’d be the FIRST to be sold, and you know it.” …*sigh*
“Peter, it’s not always about being popular, you know. Someone has to
look over Farmer Brown, make sure he’s okay there in the barn at night.
Heck, he even hung this lantern on me so I could help him make his way
safely back to the farm house when he’s done feeding the horses and
milking the cows. My job is important…and so is yours,” stated Scotty.
“Yeah, but what’s MY job if no one buys me? Why am I here? Why was I
grown? No children to carve me up for Halloween, no Mothers picking
me up for an autumn adornment. I’ll just sit here and
rot…useless…no point to me at all,” Peter spit out, close-to-seedless, choking back his tangy tears.
“Farmer Brown loves all of his livestock, the ones with four legs and
the ones not so much. He knows you’re worth everything to him, isn’t
that enough for you? It should be,” insisted Scotty.
Scotty added, “And as far as I’m concerned, look at how sad I would
be if you weren’t below me, especially at night. No one to talk to about
my cares and woes, no one at all, for it seems your lowlier pumpkin
pals didn’t grow the chat gene. And when I’m sad, I droop even more, and
that would mean that Farmer Brown could never hang this lantern on me. It would just fall off if he tried, and that would mean he’d have no
light to guide his way back home. If something happened to him, we’d all
perish. You keep me happy, I keep Farmer Brown safe, we live a peaceful and contented life here on the Farm. If no one buys you, you
are still the most important pumpkin in this patch…to me, to Farmer
Brown, to All of Us,” Scotty genuinely jawed with love
,
,
as Charlie, Cedric and Calvin Corn nodded in agreement from across the dirt road.
“Yeah, Peter, Scotty is right!” Charlie Corn blurted out, colonels of
corn spewing in every direction onto the cold, hard ground,“If it weren’t for you, we’d all perish!” the look of veggie fright on his mature husk.
Charlie must have spoken a wee bit too loud, for Farmer Brown yelled back, “Who’s out there? Anyone out there?”
Cedric and Calvin Corn swatted Charlie with their dried, crusty husks as
they scolded, “Geez, watch it, will ya. Any more ruckus
and we’ll be caught by Farmer Brown, and I can’t imagine the amount of
shrink visits he would need if he caught us all yakking. Don’t think
veggies are supposed to be able to talk, ya know?”
“Rrrright…thanks for the reminder,” softly chimed in Charlie. Scotty and Peter silently nodding in agreement.
“Listen, we’re all here to do very important jobs. Farms don’t run
themselves, ya know? Sure, it looks all pastoral perfection but imagine
if I weren’t here—Crow City it would be. Imagine if Farmer Brown had
none of us to sell at all, no corn, no pumpkins, because the Crazy Crows
had taken over. We help each other, we’re here for and because of each
other. We’re a farm fraternity, we make the country as beautiful as it
seems to the Outsiders, whether they “buy” Us or not.
*Creeeeeeeak*
went the hinges on the single barn door as Farmer Brown closed up for
the night. The golden glow from the many lanterns lit inside,
extinguished now. The farm, the pasture, all in darkness, save for the
single lantern left alight on Scotty. Farmer Brown slowly sauntered
down the dusty lane, a smouldering pipe in his mouth and a small wagon in
tow, picking up his lantern from the arm of Scotty before making his
way to the gate. But before he left the pumpkin patch, he bent down and
plucked Peter from his vines and with a wide, satisfied smile, gently,
oh, so gently, lifted him into the wagon.
“Mm, Mm, Mm," said Farmer Brown. Is Betty, my one heck of a
wonderful farmer’s wife, gonna be glad to see you! Oh, yeah, she’s got
great plans for you, Mr. Pumpkin Head— pumpkin pies, pumpkin loaves,
hot pumpkin soups, she’ll dry and salt your seeds for delicious pumpkin
seed snacks, and then she’ll carve you up but good and sit you high and
wide on the ledge of our big picture window to attract the last of this Season’s
veggie-buying crowd. We are so lucky you grew so well, Mr. P.
H. It’ll make a perfect end to a perfect Harvest Sale for all of us this
year.”
With utter astonishment on his firmly ripened face, and the glowing
wide-mouthed cracking grins of his buddies, off went Peter Pumpkin to his
rarefied destiny. The gang, seen only with the cool
glow from the harvest moon, quietly waved goodbye and a Fare Thee Well
with their crisp, dried-leafed hands, so
utterly thrilled that, in the end, all had worked out for Peter.
“Peter was one uptight pumpkin alright,” Scotty said to the gang once
Farmer Brown was out of earshot. “Worrying and fretting over nothing,
Peter did. That’s what you get when farmers spill out the last of their
cold coffee on a pumpkin patch on their way home from the Barn.
Caffeine is a buggar on the nerves!”